Plan to be safe. Escaping an abusive relationship takes planning, whether you're leaving an abusive home or breaking up with a dangerous boyfriend. At its most basic, safety planning is just thinking ahead about your situation: try to predict what's going to happen and come up with a plan to avoid danger.

Safety Planning Overview:

Tell someone: The most important step is to make sure that other people know about what is happening. It's best to talk to your parents, teachers, or other authority. If you're not comfortable talking to them, tell your friends what is going on. Chances are, they probably have a pretty good idea of what's happening already. This one is so important it gets its own page.

Safety in numbers: Always try to stay in public places or places where you have friends around, and always make sure that someone knows where you are going and when to expect you back.

Be ready to run: Always carry spare change, a charged cell phone or calling card, the number to the local shelter, the number of someone who can give you a ride, and anything else you might need if you have to act quickly to avoid or escape danger.

Change your habits: Use different routes to get to school, work, or after-school activities. Eat lunch and hang out in different places, change your locker and class schedule if possible.

Keep a journal: Keep a journal to record incidents of abuse: write down what happened, along with the date, time, location, and names of anyone who witnessed it. Also, save any threatening letters, voicemails, text messages, e-mail messages, or other communications.

Have a Written Safety Plan:

Thinking about what you will do is better than nothing, but it's not as good as talking with professionals and taking the time to develop a written plan. Use the link below to download a blank safety plan:
Safety Plan from endabuse.org.

Safety Planning for Breaking Up: Breaking up is hard, and you will probably have mixed feelings about ending your relationship. It's hard to leave a relationship that has been a big part of your life, and it's difficult to break up with someone you care about.

• The National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline has an excellent guide: Breaking up safely.
• Remember that the most dangerous time is breaking up and immediately after.
• Don't break up in person if you don't feel safe. Break up over the phone or by e-mail.
• Break up with your partner in a public place so that there will be people around.
• Tell someone else what you are planning, and check in with that person when it's over.
• Plan your escape in advance: rehearse in your mind what you will do if your partner becomes violent while you are breaking up.